Community Service: Looting Condoms

Wonder why the police never believe these guys.  

Perhaps they just need to come up with better lies!

Company manufacturing defective Condoms linked to Planned Parenthood

The mysterious source of defective condoms has been traced to a small manufacturer located in the rural town of Waterproof, Louisiana (yes it's a real town).  However the most shocking thing revealed from this intensive investigation was not just the leaky rubbers, but the fact that when the incorporation papers of The National Rubber Com. were researched it was revealed that Planned Parenthood was the biggest share holder in this Louisiana company.  This apparent "conflict of interest" has conservative groups calling for an investigation by Loretta Lynch's Justice Department.  However White House spokesmen have indicated the DOJ will take no action.  After all according to the spokesperson Planned Parenthood cannot be blamed for wanting to drum up more business---after all that is capitalism!