Breaking News: Former President Obama had massive 50 ton door removed at NORAD bunker in Cheyenne Mountain

Just revealed government documents show that the Obama administration had the massive 50 ton (100,000lb) door at the NORAD bunker deep inside Cheyenne Mountain in Colorado removed.  Citing it was no longer necessary because of easing tensions between the United States and Russia due to the work of Secretary of State Hillary Clinton and her unique 'Reset Button'.  Additionally, the secret documents showed the huge door could be sold at auction for an estimated $5 million.  Money that was needed by the military at that time to institute racial and sexual awareness programs at the nations three military academies.  However, much to the dismay of Obama and those in his inner circles, the door only fetched a measly $100,000 at the government auction.  Additionally, to add insult to injury it was purchased by the one remaining Gun Store in the San Francisco Bay area, "Sams, 'Shoot a Liberal on Demand' Gun Emporium"!  It is being reported that when President Trump learned the door vital to our national defense had been sold by the previous administration, he was outraged and was going to build 'The Mother of all Doors' at the Cheyenne Mountain complex.

FBI Director James Comey, fired by Donald Trump -- Hows do you say 'draining the swamp'

During the past year both Democrats and Republicans had called for the FBI Director to resign or be fired.  Now that President Trump has made that decision, those in the Democratic party are throwing up their hands and screaming foul.  Let's face it, the only action President Trump could take that would meet with the approval of those on the left side of the aisle would be to tender his resignation.

California Democrats would combine Cinco de Mayo Day with 4th of July

Unnamed sources in the California Congressional delegation who wish to remain anonymous are reporting a behind the scene effort to draft a bill that would combine the Mexican day, Cinco de Mayo with the U.S. day of the 4th of July.  With both days being celebrated on May 5.  The reason for using the May 5 date is actually quite simple.  That day comes first on the calendar year.  Those supporting this effort say it would promote solidarity not only with Mexico, but would help to unite those undocumented Mexicans with their gringo brothers and sisters.  However, it should be noted that many groups oppose this move.  The National Alliance of Firework Manufactures has voiced serious opposition to this move, claiming that the two days account for a large percentage of their annual sales.  And that combining the two, would drastically reduce yearly sales.  Also the AAAP (American Association of Alcohol Producers) has voiced opposition to this idea for similar reasons.  Positions on this future proposal have also divided the nation along partisan lines.  With most Democrats voicing little opposition, while Republicans are strongly opposed.  And as you might expect, support for this proposal is growing on both the east and west coast as well as in the national media.  With those in the heartland threatening to secede, with Texas leading the way, should any such measure be adopted.  Of course, this is just a piece of fictional satire, but if you think it to be farfetched---just remember, it was only a few short years ago that anyone would have predicted that statues of Confederate soldiers would be torn down and in some cases, their final resting place be violated.  

Did you know that 12 Black teens beat a 6-month Pregnant White Woman in Sanford Florida

Did you hear about the beating of a 6-month pregnant white woman at the hands of black teens in Sanford, Florida.  Not a peep from those in the main stream media.  Of course unlike the shooting that banner headlines from coast to coast when the victim was black and the perk was white, in this case it was the reverse.  Read more on this story HERE!

Liberals in Disarray as They Don’t Know Which Way to Face During Prayers, Obama forgot to leave his GPS coordinates with them while on vacation

Liberals were in shambles during their early Friday morning prayer session because former President Obama had inadvertently forgotten to post his exact location for a family vacation he had planned for the long weekend. Worshipers took to improvising and during the morning and afternoon sessions multiplied their prayers while kneeling in every possible direction. 

It wasn’t until after the afternoon prayer session that religious authorities posted their ‘fallback coordinates’ of President Bill Clinton’s location. But, during the evening session as supplications were being made to President Clinton, Obama’s location was discovered and was immediately posted. Worshipers quickly turned and knelt in Obama’s direction, with their asses pointed in Clinton’s direction.  

Thanks to Whacked News.

Confederate Flags and Monuments are responsible for High Death rates in American cities

Americans must learn to listen to those well-informed members of the media.  Not only are they men and women of the world, but most have a college degree in journalism.  A degree that demands they tell the truth when conveying the news to the general public.  They will never, never let their personal biases influence the way they present the news.  Three cheers for the members of the press.